This week's down the toilet...seriously!

Good morning!






Sorry I've been missing this week. I had every intention of doing a lot of writing and submitting and editing and blogging. Turns out, none of that got done.





I'd like to blame it on the kitten, but let's face it: Last night's drama was just a drop in the proverbial pool of real life that I jumped in this week.





Monday started with me losing my voice completely after a long weekend of single parenting and being sick with a horrifying sore throat. Hubby came home Monday night, but Tuesday and Wednesday were all about just getting healthy and getting my voice back. (I couldn't even sing Rick Springfield songs in my car...that's how lost my voice was!)



By last night, I was ready to settle down, watch some Survivor Season 9 on DVD with the Girl and enjoy the man free house since Hubby and The Boy were on their way to the Lutheran Youth Rally in Northern Wisconsin.


That's when Junior decided to try his paws at jumping onto, and then into, the toilet.


Not a problem until you realize that I use those tidy bowl blue deals that make the toilet water lovely and dark blue. Not good for kitties.


So, a series of calls and $65 later, (did you know there was a kitty poison control? Me either! And they take major credit cards right over the phone!) Junior puked and all was well.


So here we are at Thursday. I have a day to pack and drag the clan kicking and screaming to to the northwoods where we're supposed to spend a weekend with the g-parents and extended family. (10 people, two bedrooms, one bathroom. How much fun is THAT?) Now I hear from my mother that she and pops won't be there. Ummmmm, WHAT?????????? I can't even begin to anaylize this latest chapter in the passive agressive tangle that is my relationship with my mother (read "dream in color," you'll get a good flavor of that.) but the long and short of it that I am now in charge of cooking and caring for 7 other people in a building roughly the size of my basement, with all the comforts of said basement. And the whole reason I was commanded to show up was to get the kids together with the grandparents.



But enough excuses. I haven't written. I haven't written one new word in two weeks. I did submit "Lies in Chance" to The Wild Rose Press. The rejections I've gotten on this project have been all over the place. Some like the story, but not the writing. Some like the writing, but not the story. (I know, I don't get that either.) Some like the story and the writing, but not the characters. (I can't make this up.) And some like the story, the writing, the characters, but not the fact that it's a story with multiple points of view. It's exhausting trying to figure out what editors and agents want! And this is why, if my friends at The Wild Rose Press don't have a home for it (and they may not, since this isn't a romance in the strictest terms.) I'm going to dip my toe in the self pub waters.



So watch for that in the next 45-60 days.



Meanwhile, I have been working on my creative non fiction project over at my other blog http://itcanonlyhappentosarah.blogspot.com/ My hopes for this also lie in the self pub world, something sort of along the lines of the late, great Erma Bombeck. The working title for that project is "Stalking Rick Springfield and other Habits of the Middle Aged Woman." Pop on over to that blog and let me know what you think!

Meanwhile...go forth and WRITE! (After you purchase your copy of Dream in Color!)

Monty Python had it right!

Good morning!

Whew! This is a super busy week. It's Christian Education week at The Girl's school and I'm loaded up with volunteering events all week long. THEN, Saturday I have to take The Girl to see My Grandmother for a school project THEN we've got a cheer leading banquet on Sunday, in addition to the usual Sunday School whoop de dooooo...

Meanwhile, I'm supposed to be working full time AND cranking out short stories for The Wild Rose Press. (I got one out...it's under consideration at the moment. One down, two to go!)
What's a fiction writer to do when her real life crashes into her writing time?

It's the big question we all face, isn't it? We all have busy lives. I don't know a single writer who isn't working/raising kids/volunteering/being superhuman every day. Yet, some folks are far more productive than others. How is that possible?

I ask myself that every day, and, since I have yet to invent the 27 hour day, the only thing I can come up with is this: Discipline.

It takes discipline to write every single day. I don't have that discipline yet, but I am working on it. A writer writes. Every day.

Easier said than done, though right? Everything gets in the way. Everything. Work, kids, bills, school, church, your favorite TV show, whatever, it all piles up and crushes you until you think you don't have another second in the day to breath.

So no, I don't write fiction every day. I don't work on my stories every day. What I do is I write SOMETHING every day. Maybe I blog on one day. Maybe I sit down and write out a query letter. But every day I do something, even if it's for a few minutes, that keeps my mind on writing.

Once you get into a groove of thinking about your writing every day, you'll be amazed just how fast you get yourself to the words, "THE END" of your story.

Another thing that's really boosted my writing production is I jump between projects. This is something I've done for years. Maybe I'm sick of editing one thing. So I take a day and work on a title, or create a back story, or jot down some notes on a different story. The great gents in Monty Python's Flying Circus started out every show with the line, "And now for something completely different." The boys were brilliant. Keeping that thought in mind will keep your create juices flowing, even if you're stalled on one project.

So my friends, today I probably won't get to the short story I wanted to work on. But I took ten minutes and got this out there. I'm hoping that I've inspired you...but I'm also hoping I've inspired myself.

And now, for something completely different!
DO YOU HAVE YOUR COPY OF DREAM IN COLOR YET????????

How can I focus on work when there's so much writing to be done?

Yeah, if only this would be my focus!

Good morning all! It's been a while, but that's because, as I'm finding out, retail, even online retail this time of year is one big huge ball of HOLY CRAP!

I've said it before. As writers, we sometimes put everything before actual writing. I'm living proof. I haven't written a new word on my work in progress in over a month. My excuse is that I have to call my DJ friend for some back ground and he's really busy with make wish and what not over the holidays. But we all know the real reason I haven't written. It's because I've put absolutely everything before my writing.

I can't write, I have to decorate, do cards, shop, bake, clean, watch the Packers, go carolling, shop, do laundry, shop, wrap presents, shop, drive someplace, shop.

You get the picture.

But it's okay. Here's the great thing about being a virtually unknown writer. No one really cares if you're writing! LOL! Of course, this is the mind set that also keeps you a virtually unknown writer! Which is why, in the midst of the holiday panic, I'm still submitting to agents and editors.

And guess what else I've discovered: After years of sending out hundreds of Christmas cards and letters, I missed last year. The world didn't end. The planet didn't stop turning. My relatives still pretty much talk to me.

I liked it so much...I may not send any out this year! Of course, two years in a row will mean fewer cards next year, and I do like getting Christmas cards. It makes me feel loved! LOL!

Hey, take a deep breath this holiday season. Write when you can, but mostly don't beat yourself up if you can't get to it. It's a hard catch 22, being an unknown, unpublished writer, and not being able to work on getting known, getting published. But that's a catch 22 that's simply not going to solve itself before Christmas, so just keep putting one foot in front of the other and have a very, very Merry Christmas (or whatever it is you celebrate this time of the year.)

Personally, I'm going to make a cup of tea and watch "White Christmas" ten or fifteen times.

When all else fails, dance!

Greetings!

I've often pondered the fact that many women my age (in those whimsical early 40's) spend a lot of time trying to get away from their families. I mean, ladies, think about it: How hard did we work, back in the day, to land a husband? Granted, I can only speak for myself, but, given the staggering popularity of romance novels even in today's economy, I'm thinking I wasn't alone in the ideal of "Happily ever after."

And then kids! Was there anything more beautiful than the picture of you, eight months pregnant, sitting in a rocking chair, wearing something white, gauzy, and flowing, smiling gently as a rolly poly youngster plays contentedly at your feet?

Was there anymore less realistic?

(As I recall, my second pregnancy involved vomitting on the hour, every hour. I couldn't stand the smell of grilling meat, and I was pregnant all summer in WI, home to the daily meat grilling. Bonus, my three year old boy child didn't understand the concept of "Quiet time" and for hubby the shine had long worn off the magic of pregnancy and he was no way going to get up in the middle of the night and fetch me anything. His reasoning was sound. I'd probably puke it up right away anyway.)

But I digress. After all the work we put into "happily ever after" how come we spend so much time and effort on "happily alone?"

I have a friend who is never happier than when her husband goes to his relatives home up north. Another friend bemoans the fact that her husband has only taken her children away one weekend in all their years together. Personally, I fear I'll never get a weekend alone again since, while hubby runs to La Crosse almost every month to see family and hike in the state parks, and generally takes girl child with him, BOY CHILD now has a job and works every weekend. I long for the days when I could sit in front of the TV and watch something that didn't involve sports experts shouting at each other or the mouse channel spewing forth some new star that's ever so dreamy to the preteen set.

Wow, that was a run on sentence, wasn't it?

So what is it about a woman in her middle years and the ache to be alone...and not just alone...no, no. ALONE IN HER OWN HOME!

I have a friend whose husband told her to go someplace for the weekend. She shouted back that she shouldn't have to leave her home to get peace and quiet, that he should take the children.

So how does a woman, who wants peace and alone time in her home manage it? I think I have the answer: DANCE!

You know you all danced with your kids when they were babies. You, the young mother, were the first one on the floor at a wedding when they played the bunny hop or the hokey pokey. You danced to Sesame Street, Blues Clues, Dora, and yes, there were moments when you danced with the Teletubbies. (But mostly because by the time Teletubbies came on, you were giddy with the dancing and couldn't stop.)

Then the children went to school and came back with a very definite idea of what "COOL" is and guess what...it ain't you! (Or me.)

My kids USED TO LOVE when I danced and sang with them. But now, now since I can't quite scream like the boy's thrash metal howling bands, or I'm not adorable and curly haired like a certain Jo Bro, well, I'm no longer allowed to sing and dance.

I went to Summerfest...to the Classic Rock (Read here, "OLD FART") stage. These were my people. Overaged, overweight, over anything new. And I danced with them. And then I looked around and realized that my oh-so-cool kids had ditched me.

Hmmmm, I was on to something!

So I tried it at church. Not that we dance at church, we're not that sort of fun church, but there's sometimes music that has a certain non-Germanic Lutheran beat to it, and I started tapping my toes there in the pew, sort of "pew dancing." Boy child looked at me and whispered, "Stop."

My friends, I believe I have it! Got kids? Got a husband? Want them to leave you alone?

DANCE!

DANCE your middle aged booty all over the house. Dance for no reason. Dance when there's no music. Create your own by humming, or, better yet, singing! And if they tell you to stop, shout at them, as if you had your ears plugged with earbuds, "IF YOU WEREN'T HERE YOU WOULDN'T SEE ME DO THIS!"

Granted, Hubby might find this new motion a bit of a turn on. But, if you're doing it right, even he won't want to be around you, you train wreck of a Solid Gold Dancer wannbe, you! (I've tried it. It takes a bit, but it has worked for me!)

It's a pity Billy Mays is no longer with us. I'd love to put together some sort of dance lesson video, and have him pitch it. He'd probably come up with a cool name for it, like "FAMILY BEGONE."

So my friends, if you want a quiet weekend for writing, and nothing seems to work...if all else fails, DANCE!