A HERO'S SPARK: the final book in the Wicked Women series!

Saturday, July 13, 2013

Sneak peak SATURDAY! "Not While I'm Chewing."

Good morning!

Many of you know...or should know...that I recently released the first Elsie W. book entitled "Not While I'm Chewing." 

I thought I'd make your Saturday a bit brighter by sharing a small snippet.

Remember, you can purchase the entire book in print or Kindle form by clicking HERE! 

If you have a Nook or some other digital reading device, you can purchase this book by clicking HERE!

Meanwhile:  Enjoy!
It didn’t take me long at Stuff, Installed to figure out that I had some vital, and specialized skills that few had. Who knew having these skills would be so important?

          First of all, I can read and translate a paycheck.

         When I got my first paycheck from Stuff, Installed, I was pretty jazzed as I read through hourly pay, overtime pay, deductions, totals, all that good stuff. I like reading and studying my paychecks. We’d just changed payroll services and the checks were really easy and almost fun to read.

 the desk next to mine:

          "WHAT? This isn't right! This. Is. Not. RIGHT!"

          “What's not right?” (Why do I get involved?)

          "My deductions. Who can live on this if this is how much they're deducting?” (Truly, a question we all ask.)

          I didn't get very involved past that for about five minutes. Then ELSIE W. stopped NBM (this only causes more hilarity. Read on.)

          ELSIE:  I need to talk to you about my paycheck. (She waves the tatters of the check, which is one of those that's held together by perforations and you're supposed to fold along the lines and THEN tear the ends off. She sort of forgot to fold on the lines.)

         NBM:  What did you do to your paycheck?

        ELSIE:  Nothing. I mean, I couldn't open it, so I just tore at it.

        NBM:  I hope you haven't voided it by tearing it almost in half.

       ELSIE:  WHAT? You can do that?

       (I should interject here that NBM, I believe, LOVES to needle Elsie. LOVES IT. Sort of like a nine year old boy poking at a dead animal. For him, it's fun, it's easy, and it provides amusement in an otherwise boring day. I'm just guessing, given how often he does it.)

          NBM:  Yep, you can. So what's wrong with your paycheck, other than the fact that it's torn?

          ELSIE:  It's not right. How am I supposed to live on this?
         His cell phone rang and that took NBM out of the conversation. I don't like watching the wounded, so I rolled my chair over to her desk.

        SARAH: What is the problem?

          ELSIE:  It's not right. They took twelve hundred dollars in taxes out of my check.

         (Let me just say, if they took twelve hundred out of one of her paychecks, I'm thinking I'm being WAY underpaid!)

        "Let me just look at it.” I looked at it and realize instantly what the issue was. "The twelve hundred dollars is your gross pay to date. The amount of taxes taken out is right here.” I pointed to the column.

          Elsie frowned. “It's too much taken out. How am I supposed to live on this if they're going to take that much out in taxes?”

         "I ask myself that all the time. But see, these are the hours you worked. This is your hourly wage. You multiply this by this and you get this number here."

“I don't know. I don't think you're right.”

          (I guess I should have known I was in trouble. She asked me the other day to figure out, with the calculator on my desk, what twenty percent of one thousand was. Her calculator kept telling her two hundred, but she just knew that wasn't right.)

            "It's right. The total on your check is the total after they take out taxes. That's the amount of money you have."

            She was quiet then...but that didn't end the issue. Later in the day, after everyone else had gone home for the night, she called the home office...and got very upset when they were closed. (They are in the Eastern Time Zone. We are in the Central Time Zone.)
                   She saved up her frustration until she got to work the next morning at 11:07. “How come they weren’t open at six? I’m all alone in the world, and can I tell you something? They just weren’t taking my calls because they are trying to keep me down.”
                   I would explain time zones to her, but…no. They aren’t paying me less than they pay her to explain that sort of thing.

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