So this week two of my friends sold books to various publishers. Yes, I am completely thrilled for them. I've cheered them through facebook this morning. But I hate, hate, hate that I haven't sold my next book yet. It was my year goal to have a second sale and an agent by this time.
That didn't happen.
Writing is a weird business. It's competative, in that there is a somewhat finite number of books bought and published each year. (What that number is I have no idea...still...) getting your foot in the door is not easy, and keeping it in the door is harder. Yet, to be a good writer, you need to surround yourself with other writers whether it be through a group or online. You need contact with other writers to keep on top of the market, who's buying, who's not, that sort of thing. You need a critique partner, who probably should be a writer. And beta reader, someone who reads your finished book beginning to end, and makes suggestions for you (Different from a critique partner, and doesn't have to be a writer, but it never hurts to have a writer be your beta reader. Mine isn't...but she reads so much it was a no brainer to pick her.)
With all of that, and given the amount of failure (rejection) that's in this business, it's a sort of love/hate relationship we all have with fellow writers.
Oh, we are all friends. We cheer each other. We are excited when someone succeeds, but there's that tiny place in our brains, it's a place not too many of us admits even exists, but it's there. It's the part of our brain that says, "I'm a way better writer than he/she is...why haven't I sold a book?"
The world of romance writing is especially thick with this feeling because, well, it's mostly women writing and any time you get a large group of women working for a similar, but very individual common goal, things get a tiny bit messy. I've been to conference with women who will point out others and say, "See her? I helped get her published. So why can't I get published?"
That sense of "Why not me" fades a little bit once you have a sale. A lot of things fade once you have a sale. But there's still that huge feeling of "How come she got an agent? Why can't I get an advance like that?" Even for authors who have sold a couple of books...the desire to do as well as others is tremendous.
So, yes, of course I've congratulated my two friends. And I truly am happy for them, both of them are dedicated, hard working authors. Both deserve this great moment, without question. But meanwhile, my next book languishes in rejection hell, and my short story is sitting on some one's desk, waiting, and waiting and waiting. I want it to happen to ME...again! :)
That's just a part of nature, I guess. Not the best part, but a part.
Meanwhile....TOMORROW IS THE DAY! twenty four hours from now I'll be rocking out at Potowatami Casino with 499 new friends and Rick Springfield! My toes are painted, my eyebrows are plucked. My hair is colored, and I've done what I can to remove unwanted facial hair. I've bought a new top and cute sandals. Now...if Rick looks up to the second row of the balcony, he'll get a view of me and think...that I'm completely adequate as a concert goer! LOL!
BTW, speaking of published books...do YOU have YOUR copy of Dream in Color?
Have a great Thursday!