Embracing setbacks...but maybe not just yet.

Good evening.

Funny how different things can be in 24 hours.  24 hours ago, I was planning on how many times I was going to go to the gym this week yet.  I was eager to use my new yoga mat at a class my friend Dee was teaching.  I had a goal, 24 hours ago, to start training for a 5K this spring.

24 hours later, I'm praying the gym can cancel or suspend my membership until further notice.  24 hours later, I know I won't need a class to use my yoga mat, because there's a slight chance I'll have to sleep on it at some point.  24 hours later, we are where we were two years ago at this very same time.

Two years ago my husband lost his job.  He never saw it coming.  Everything was fine, fine fine.  Then BAM.  the old "We're going in a new direction and we're not taking you with us."

He was out of work for 6 weeks.  Not a long time by any standards these days, but certainly a very scary 6 weeks.  He found a job in the same business, doing the same thing, for slightly more money.  It seemed like a really nice, family centered place.  And everything, for nearly two years, was fine, fine fine.  We even got a Christmas card from his boss.

Yesterday, he was fired.  Again...with no warning.  This time, because his boss wanted to hire someone else...and that someone else had just gotten fired from his job, a job he kept over numerous offers from the boss.  I guess, when you've been fired, even a job you've passed on five times looks good.  So, boss finally gets his wet dream of an employee.  Employee gets to work with people he used to work with, people who really didn't like him the first time around.  Meanwhile, my husband is kicked out the door with no warning and very little in the way of severance.  (They didn't even give him his check that he had coming today.   He has to wait until it's been "processed.")

But I'm not telling you this to make you feel sorry for me.  Not really.  Sure, I'm at a low point in my faith in pretty much everything tonight.  My husband is the dream employee...he's hardworking, college educated, quick learning, great with people, and he'll skip lunches, days off, and weekends to do what needs doing.  And he got dumped because the apple of the boss's eye got canned two days ago and now deigns to work there.

No, I'm not telling you this make you feel sorry for me or my family.  We will, with much prayer and hard work, get through this just like we've gotten through everything else.  I'm telling you this, my writing friends, because I know every one of you has a story like this.  And, if not a story, a setback, something that can, and does, keep you from your goal of writing for a living.

There's no money in writing.  Not really.  Not for most.  Sure, if your name is James Patterson, or Snooki, you've got the steady writing income.  But for the vast majority of authors, we all have to work a J. O. B. to pay the bills between royalty checks.

The temptation is out there, certainly has been for me, to drop writing totally and focus on making money.  Just work two, three jobs and pay the bills and give up the stories in my head for something more solid, more steady.

This is when it's gut check time.  I work full time.  I write in the late and early hours of the day and on weekends.  Those are times of the day I could fill with a second paycheck while my husband looks for work and trains for more job skills that might get him employed for a year or two, until the next nepotism train pulls into the station.

I could do that...

Or I could embrace this as a moment to really focus on what I love most and maybe turn that into something big for my husband and my family.

Hey, if he's not working, he'll be doing those projects around the house. Which means the house will be in cleaner, better shape, which means I'm more apt to come home and feel like I could write a chapter or two.  I could crank out Two Elsie books and finish the new novel by year's end.

This could be good for my writing career.  Adversity is what we authors live on, and frankly, I live in the suburbs of a mid sized Midwest city. 

I could...I will...embrace this setback.

Just maybe not today.

Looking for an open window...possibly from which to push Bossman!

Good morning all.

I know it's been some days since I've checked in, but there's a good reason. On Saturday night my husband announced, quite casually, that he'd lost his job on Friday.

How does one "lose" a job? Can't he just retrace his steps and find it?

Turns out, that, in spite of more than a decade of faithful service, and in spite of the facts that his body shop's numbers were the highest in the company and his customer service rating was highest in the company, he simply wasn't moving quickly enough on some initiative. Of course, this was an intiative for which he'd had only partial training and which, of course, there was no time table.

How does one move too slowly on something that has no timetable?

If you smell a rat, you're not alone. We believe that his 20 something assistant will ultimately get his job. It's not her fault, this is pure coporate b---s---. Still, it's worth a phone call to our local employment lawyer, doncha think?

But none of that matters. What matters is that we have, in one swift move, lost our household income, and our health and dental insurance.

There was no warning, there was no thought that this was a possibility. When they hired the assistant, I had that niggling worry that this would be the case, but hubby insisted that the company was finally giving him the help he needed.

Yeah, we should have smelled a rat then...this is a company that's more interested in the bottom line for its owners than in treating their employees with any sort of human decency.

So now, Wednesday, I am facing some cold hard facts.

1) Unemployment will pay a mere 40% of what hubby was making.

2) Cobra is very expensive, but we have kids...we can't go without insurance.

3) Evil Bossman now has me tightly in his power...and he knows it.

I am struggling to trust that God is going to open a window now that this door is closed. Hubby and I had no large designs on a life of wealth. We wanted a simple life with friends and family, make sure our children are educated and given opportunities to move forward on their own two feet, and maybe, maybe be able to retire some time after we turn 80. We were paying our bills, and this was the year we were going to start really putting away a bit of money here and there.

Slam the door on that.

Meanwhile, Evil Bossman, who on Monday was very supportive and sympathetic, decided on Tuesday that since I have no choice but to stay where I am for next while, he would be extra ass hole ish toward me, and then shout at me about how my pissy attitude wasn't acceptable in the workplace. (Seriously. I've put in a days' worth of overtime this week, for which I will not be paid, but the first thing he says to me yesterday is "Your coffee pot is dirty." Ya think? Well, that does happen when there's COFFEE IN IT!)

So God, if you're listening up there, please help hubby find a job soon and please give me the strength not to push Bossman out that window You promise!

Meanwhile, I'm marking time until "Dream" comes out on 3-19. Something good has to come out of all this, right?